jho_log

“ Love doesn’t always mean to love someone you think can love you in return, but to love those who you think can’t afford to feel the same…”


Date: 02/12/8

Time: 10:50 P.M



Beloved Lady,

Hyvää Huomenta!


It took me some time to look for the appropriate sentence structure to construct this epistle uniquely…I don’t know if I’m doing the right thing or if I’m on the right track…Well, I am not a poet or a descendant of Shakespeare. I am also not a writer of romantic novels or pocketbooks… I am just an ordinary person with an extraordinary passion…

Perhaps you are thinking that I am confident enough to do this thing… But believe me, I don’t really comprehend what am I doing. It’s as if, a hopeless-romantic-spirit is possessing me! Hehehe…kidding!

You know, I’m actually fretful coz I never know how are you gonna deal with this… I mean, I fear that you will become reluctant to continue making friends with me, if you will find out my deepest darkest secret… Well I guess, you already have a clue of what am I gonna reveal right?..I hope you wont take this against me..

Here we go:

I tried to essay the intensity of these strange feelings I have for you, at first, I thought it was just a mere infatuation coz you have these “resemblance” with my “wXyz”… But I was wrong, coz the more I get to know you, the more I feel that my feelings for you is real… I knew right from the start that somebody owns your heart. Therefore, I tried to suppress this emotion, but it was already too late, for my heart has found its new anchorage in you, it seems that a part of me knows that you have those emotional tools to restore my wrecked heart… You thaw out my FROZEN EMOTION and you bring back the equilibrium of my compassion…

This may sound absurd, but I’m fearlessly telling you that it came over me in a rush when I realized that “I’ve got the hots for you Lady Ice“! Please, don’t get me wrong; I am not courting you ha… I’m just letting you know what I truly feel. I could no longer hide these, for keeping these to myself gives me sleepless nights and all sorts of pain… I’m sorry if I let myself fall for you, I was trying to kill these feelings, but I really can’t convince my heart to stop loving you… Well, blame it to your pulchritude features and voluptuous physique…Hehehe…and who am I to fight against the power of love by the way?

Don’t fret! I won’t ask you to put me inside your heart coz I know you wouldn’t do. However, can I just stay inside your lungs? Or on your rib cage? At least I can get closer to your heart dvah… I will be the lookout of your heart… I will know when you are sad or happy and I will know if you are hurt… I’ll take care of your heart and fix the flaws on it…Yet, I wont promise to heal your wounds coz I know I’m not the cure for your pains…and I’m not the accurate medicine to mend it… hmm, FYI my heart is quite rebellious and I really don’t know why… It’s very obstinate; it won’t listen to me….


Okay, enough with my silly jests lets continue…

Apparently, I am destined to love you in a one-sided way, and I must accept the fact that no ones gonna give me an exact amount of love I needed… Moreover, I know that, love is not for me to receive but for me to give away. Besides, I don’t have the right to ask for something more than friendship… Coz people like me don’t deserve to be love by anyone else. I must learn to isolate myself from you coz I know that you will never be mine and there will never be us. I’m very much contented with the way you treat me and with the little amount of attention you’ve shown unto me…For now, I’m trying to take a grip with my emotion and I don’t wanna invest more feelings towards you, coz im pretty sure, these feelings will only be put in vain…

You see, I’m freaky and you’re godly… you’re so very special and im not that special… so it’s impossible for both of us to be together… I need to wake up from this illusion, face the reality, and start living my life by myself… It would be so stupid to build my world with you when you’ll never gonna build your world with me… I have to stop dreaming and aiming for something I can never have… These only prove, how weird I am and I’m worse than a person having a terminal stage of cancer…

I know that you’ll never gonna love me back and no ones gonna love me no matter how much love I offer! I don’t wanna beseech for your love, coz I know for sure, that your love can’t be buy nor beg…(or bisan mapalit pna, still I can’t afford) Well, cest lavie! This is the irony of love…hehehe… By the way, I’m not after into something ha, I know my stand and I revered your relationship with your partner… it’s enough for me that I’ve been able to tell you the truth and I was able to burst out my exaggerations…hehehe… Well, it’s not that easy to pour out my emotion here you know?! Thanks for taking time reading my melodramatic dispatch… I gotta go, fatigue is already haunting meh! Please, stay the same…


“Love can make us the happiest person on earth, but it can also make us the most miserable being in the whole galaxy…”






Loving you beyond doubts,


Broken Spirit

jelai

hmmm... its so familiar... i hope im wrong pero do i know who is "beloved lady" ?

jho_log

well, actually beloved lady is just my way of endearing someone i love...hehehe..

jelai

and so "broken spirit" is "you"?

jho_log

yeah..broken sprirt is my alter-ego...hehehe...nothing has changed nmn kc with my lovelife...im always a loser in this fight...kaya nga dinadaan ko nlng sa work laht pra wla na ako masyadong iisipin...hehehe...